As the MLB trade deadline rapidly approaches, like something a college student procrastinates on, and the rumors begin to swirl we are here to start even more rumors. So here is our list of players who may or may not be traded and where they will go. Baltimore Orioles Zach Britton – If you aren’t going to use him in the playoffs might as well trade him - Dodgers Darren O’Day – His submarine style should send him to a city surrounded by water - Mariners Mark Trumbo – So much power, so little anything else - Royals Chris Davis – Same as above but can play defense somewhat - Twins Brad Brach – Bad teams don’t need to keep middle relievers – Red Sox Richard Bleier – Trade relievers while they have some value especially if they’re old - Yankees Mychal Givens – Relievers can’t really help you if you aren’t winning - Nationals Toronto Blue Jays Josh Donaldson – Toronto starts a fire sale! - Brewers Justin Smoak – he will only be good for a year so might as well trade him now - Rockies Troy Tulowitzki – It didn’t really work for him in Toronto - Diamondbacks Jose Bautista – The fire sale gets hotter - Brewers Kendrys Morales – Doesn’t he always get traded at the deadline? - Angels Detroit Tigers Justin Verlander – Does Kate Upton like Milwaukee? - Brewers Miguel Cabrera – yet another fire sale - Astros Victor Martinez – or maybe he should just retire - Yankees Ian Kinsler – maybe he could be good again in a hitter’s friendly park – Angels Justin Upton – is his brother still around? - Rays Justin Wilson – Tigers don’t need a closer right now – Diamondbacks Warwick Saupold – they also don’t need middle relievers - Cubs Chicago White Sox Derek Holland – the White Sox should just go as young as possible - Rockies Todd Frazier – he still hits a lot of home runs right? – Red Sox Melky Cabrera – the milk man goes to the desert where there is no milk – Diamondbacks David Holmberg – trade old relief pitchers while they’re good - Rangers David Robertson – should’ve been traded awhile ago - Rays Tommy Kahnle – how else can you say good relief pitchers should be traded from bad teams - Angels Oakland A’s Yonder Alonso – Billy Beane strikes again - Rays Sonny Gray – Surprised he lasted this long - Brewers Kris Davis – young and productive, time to leave Oakland - Twins Rajai Davis – He should go back to Cleveland to hit more homers in the World Series– Indians Daniel Coulombe – good relievers never go out of style - Rockies Braves of Atlanta Julio Tehran – It seems like he’s way older than he is - Yankees Brandon Phillips – so old but yet so spry - Rays Jose Ramirez – hip hip (Jose) - Twins Miami Marlins Dustin McGowan – the only pitcher the Marlins should trade – Astros Ichiro – some partial fan gets their wish – Mariners NY Mets Addison Reed – I liked him better in Arizona – Cubs Jay Bruce – will be replaced by Tim Tebow – Nationals Philadelphia Phillies Pat Neshek - more submarine more water - Seattle Jeremy Hellickson – give me one good reason he should stay in Philly - Rays Luis Garcia – More random relievers get traded – Royals Cincinnati Reds Joey Votto – someone will take on the contract – Seattle Raisel Iglesias –pitch one inning but have big impact on playoff team (so general you are) - Rockies Wandy Peralta – the more relief pitching the better - Dodgers Zack Cozart – the donkey has to go - Twins San Diego Padres Brad Hand – the sympathy all-star gets dealt - Boston Kirby Yates – is he related to Puckett? – Angels San Francisco Giants Jeff Samardzija – could be an NFL TE right now but took MLB money instead – Angels Hunter Pence – even if the Giants might be good next year who really knows – Diamondbacks Denard Span – has grey hair, still faster than you – Rays
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